My New Administration Departments

Now you have seen what I have done with the traditional cabinet positions for my proposed administration. As you see, some of the positions I have redefined, some I simply threw out and now is the time to add new positions to my cabinet. Yes, I said ADD positions, but don't get too excited, if you read on, I am not going to grow government but shrink it. And you will get the explanation as I go along. You may be critical of some of the people I want in my administration, but there is good reason for my appointments. I DO NOT want career politicians in my administration! Career politicians are little different than other people in other professions. They start in some entry level position and then spend the rest of their working years trying to advance into higher paying positions. By the time they reach the highest levels of the political ladder, they have become experts at "Passing the buck", "Deni-ability", and "Unaccountability", not to mention "CYA". In other words, they are experts at playing the game!

"Playing the Game" is not what I want in my top level government leaders. I want people with vision, honesty and accountability. I want people to stand in FRONT and lead, not sit back and and position themselves so that others take the fall if things go wrong. Remember when you look at political leaders, that their job is to do the BEST THING FOR YOU, the American people. But career politicians can not do this because by the time they rise to the top, they owe too many favors to too many people, so they become pawns, not the servants of the people that they are supposed to be. Think about that. So, back to my administration and the people I want as our leaders, and the NEW cabinet positions I will create!

Department of Sports: Look folks, sports is a very important part of the American culture. Americans have the LOWEST amount of vacation time in the industrial world, but we are people like everyone else. And people need outlets from the pressures of the work world. They need to get away from the stress of everyday life to recharge themselves, and here in America, hundreds of millions turn to sports as their outlet. But the way sports is run in this country is at best baffling! Anti-trust exemptions for professional sports, monopoly status for amatuer sports and taxpayers required to foot the bill for billionaire owners who want new stadiums! Someone needs to get a handle on this, and quick! I want a "Sports Czar" to get this organized. I want him to give sports in America back to the people. You know my choice from ESPN and ABC television, the man to put a halt to the endless scandal so prevalent in our sports world today. Yes, I want Chris Berman, none other than "Boomer" to head this new government agency. I think that this is the man to put logic, fairness and sanity back into our beloved American sports.

Department of Acquisitions and Mergers: Now, don't get crazy on me here, I'm not talking about business here, I am talking about government. Here is an example of what I see from this position. We have been giving Mexico foreign aid for decades now, outright gifts and billions in loans. We all know that these loans will never be repaid. We all know that people from Mexico have been coming to America for hundreds of years to better their lives and to get jobs. We spend billions of dollars trying to stop this, but we never will. Now, there are plans to build a fence across California, Arizona, New Mexico and Texas to keep Mexicans in Mexico. How ridiculous is that? Are we trying to build a high tech "Great Wall of China", or an American equivalent of the "Iron Curtain"? What will we call this, the Massive Chili  Blockade? No! I say it is time to take down these artificial barriers. It is obvious that these people want to be here, so let it be! Rather than spending billions to keep them out, let's make Mexico part of the United States. Make it ALL AMERICA! YES! And the man for this is none other than George Lopez! And don't stop there George, not at all. Next you can add Canada, and possibly some other Latin American countries. And look overseas at countries like Israel. Where would they be without America. We are already in Iraq and Afghanistan, and it looks like we will never get out of there, so make them part of our country. Think of the possibilities!

Department of Consolidation and Reduction: I am ashamed to tell you that I have no name, no identified person to fill this position. So, I am asking you to give me some ideas. Help me here people. But I do have a vision for this very important position. This is the person who will look at our government from top to bottom, and identify redundancies, overlaps and simply outdated organizations, and eliminate the waste, consolidate the overlapped areas and and streamline the government. Look at our intelligence system. We have the FBI, the CIA, NSA, Naval Intelligence, Military Intelligence and Homeland Security. And I am sure that there are many more agencies in this segment of government. WHY? This country can save billions of taxpayer dollars every year by simply streamlining this segment of government, and increase efficiency and results at the same time. Government is way too big people, way too wasteful and way too inefficient. It is time to change that, but we have no mechanism in place to do this. Maybe you know of someone who can do this, and if you do, tell me who it is. Possibly some single parent, a Mom or a Dad, someone who has to struggle everyday to make ends meet. Someone who is familiar with making hard choices in their lives. Give it some thought and let me know!

Department of Truth: What is this you ask? It is what this country needs! This important position has but one responsibility, and that is to expose liars, cheats and frauds! Expose them PUBLICALY! This will give you, the people the opportunity to deal with them the way you see fit. If a government representative got elected by promising reduced government spending, then votes himself a raise, this department will call them out in public. If a representative of the people goes on a supposed "Fact Finding" trip, but really takes his wife shopping and goes to the opera instead of doing their job, I want to tell ALL AMERICANS about it! So, who can do this? Who can let us know? Who has the courage to stand up and shout about these things. Well, none other than Jay Leno! Every night, on national TV, Jay will expose those who lie, cheat and steal from you! You do with them as you will. Vote them out, recall them or indite them. But, know who they are.

So, there you have it, my entire administration. Take your choice, my way of new people, new ideas and innovative ways of doing things, or the old people, old ways, and old ideas of doing nothing. But whatever you decide to do, stop first and really look at things for the way they really are. Don't continue to walk the same old path simply because it is familiar. As I have told all of you, I am an "Old Hippie", the key word being old. I won't be around much longer, but most of you will. You will have to live with what you do or don't do today. Think about what this country needs to be like when you are my age, and start basing your decisions today based upon that vision. I am continually amazed at the sight of this world that has changed so much in my lifetime. And it will continue to change. It is up to you to set the tone and direction for those future changes. Believe me, once it changes, you can't go back and redo things. Have a Great Day.

The Old Hippie